Behavior Management

20+ Strategies for Teaching Empathy

August 13, 2019 by pathway2success Leave a Comment

Use these strategies and ideas to teach and build empathy with kids and young adults! Learners who have a lack of empathy can struggle with other social skills. Help elementary, middle, and high school kids build these skills by using literature, teaching lessons, practicing with games, and more. Also includes a free printable lesson for kids and teens. Helpful for kids with ADHD, autism, and other needs. #socialskills #empathy #pathway2success

Teaching empathy is important. In the simplest of terms, empathy is the ability to notice, understand, and share the emotions of others. It is a critical social skill for all people to have. In many ways, empathy is the social skill that paves the way for all other social skills. It helps us to take someone else’s perspective, understand each others’ emotions, connect with one another, show compassion, make good social choices, and ultimately develop lasting relationships.

What does a lack of empathy look like? Learners who lack empathy can end up with many social challenges. These kids and young adults may struggle to build friendships, have difficulty working with others, and make poor social decisions overall. Most importantly, kids and young adults who lack empathy are often unaware their behaviors can negatively impact others. These learners might do or say something that makes sense to them in the moment, without giving consideration to those around them.

Learners who lack strong empathy skills might:

Do or say something that appears rude or inappropriate, such as loudly commenting on someone else’s pimple.
Engage in socially unexpected behaviors, such as cutting to the front of the line when they want to be first.
Make comments that hurt others’ feelings, such as telling someone their shirt is ugly.
Fail to recognize times to be sensitive to others, such as mentioning how much they love their dog right after a friend’s dog passes away.

How can educators build empathy? It is critical for educators to recognize that having a lack of empathy is a skill deficit and not a behavior problem. In the words of Ross Greene, “Kids do well if they can.” There are many ways to teach, highlight, and practice skills for empathy, so these abilities can be learned over time. If you want to get started right away, I have created a whole unit targeting perspective-taking and empathy. It’s important to note that some learners are going to struggle with these skills more than others. What’s important is that you work on them slowly and watch the skills grow. Quite often, these strategies can be integrated into the classroom to help support a positive learning community for all. It’s a win-win!

Here are some strategies for building empathy:

Use literature. Using short stories and novels, you can help learners to think about the emotions and motives of characters. You might ask: How do you think they feel right now? Why do they feel that way? What might they be thinking? How would you feel if you were in their shoes? What might they do next? Best of all, using literature is an easy way to integrate social-emotional learning since it’s something that teachers teach every day!

Teach “being in someone else’s shoes.” Use situations to encourage students to think about how they might feel. Then, go the extra step and have students think about how someone else might feel. This is a critical component of empathy because how we feel might not be how someone else might feel. It’s a skill that can sometimes require lots of practice and discussion with others.

Watch videos and movie clips. Similar to literature, videos and movie clips can be a strategy to think about the emotions of characters. This may be a helpful tactic for learners who struggle with reading or just a fun activity for the end of the week. Just play a quick video clip (or watch a whole movie) and discuss the characters’ feelings, thoughts, motivations, and reactions.

Talk about emotions. Talking about feelings should be normal and expected in the classroom! Model using I-statements and teach about different emotions as they come up.

Use optical illusions to teach perspective-taking. Optical illusions are a fantastic way to teach perspective-taking because they show students that we all think differently and that’s okay! Simply show an optical illusion and have students independently write down what they see. Then, have them discuss. Soon, students will realize that they don’t all see the same thing. It’s a great way to start the discussion on perspective-taking and empathy. You can use this free perspective-taking lesson to try right away!

Keep an emotion vocabulary board. Improve each student’s emotional vocabulary by keeping a board posted with all different emotion words. Students should recognize that there are multiple shades to every emotion, from irritated to irate and content to elated. Make these words part of the norm so that students can learn to use them effectively.

Identify emotions in photos. Get random old magazines or use your own photos. Have students look through magazines or photos to find images of people. Encourage them to identify how each person might be feeling or thinking. This is such a fun activity that can be done again and again.

Teach social cues. Learners who struggle with skills for empathy can greatly benefit from learning about facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice. These can be critical cues for them to start recognizing the thoughts and feelings of others. This can be fun to teach as “social detective work.”

Role-play social scenarios. Discuss a variety of social situations and have students act out what they might do. For example, “Imagine you see someone fall down in the hall. What would you do?” This social situation encourages students to think about how someone else might feel as well as how they should respond. Come up with your own scenarios to discuss or use task cards. I have created social scenarios for elementary students and social scenarios for middle and high schoolers. Start off with this free social problem-solving task cards set to see how your students do!

Play empathy games. For learners who struggle with empathy, it is a difficult skill to learn. Games can be a highly motivating way to learn these skills. I developed a fun empathy game with many different scenarios to help learners think about how others feel and how they might show empathy to others. Best of all, there are so many scenarios that kids can play again and again.

Watch animal live cams. Who doesn’t love animals? I’ve found that kids who really struggle to show empathy with other kids are still very likely to empathize and care about animals. With that, there are many free animal live cams you can stream. In my classroom, we loved watching an owl cam, a bald eagle nest, and even a giraffe who was about to have a baby. Of course, there are many ways to integrate science, reading, and writing to any of these animal live cams. This can be a great way to help kids learn to care about and for something else.

Have a daily morning meeting. It’s important to give every student a daily check-in time. Every child and young adult needs to know they are valued, loved, and supported. Use a 10-minute morning meeting time to check-in with students and let every voice be heard.

Teach coping strategies. Kids and young adults need effective strategies for managing their tough emotions. Spend time teaching, discussing, and practicing a variety of strategies that might work for them. Practice mindful coloring, listening to music, exercising, and even yoga. It’s important to practice these activities when students are calm so that they can use them when they really need them the most. Use these coping strategies visuals or grab this free coping strategies list to give you some ideas on how to start! Also, read up on some fun and unique ways to teach coping strategies to kids and young adults.

Start an emotion journal. Help students connect with their own emotions by journaling and writing about how they are feeling. This is something that can be done first thing in the morning to help students start the day off in a positive way. Give time for students to share their feelings if they are comfortable. Not only will students benefit from expressing themselves, but others will build empathy by hearing the thoughts and feelings of those around them.

Teach how to see the other side. Learners need to understand that we all have different opinions and thoughts. Use topics such as “favorite pizza” and “best sport” to drive conversations about differences of opinions. Help all students see that we all think differently and that’s perfectly okay.

Give responsibilities. Use student strengths and abilities to give every student a responsibility in the classroom. If a student does well with technology, have him or her be the computer troubleshooter. If a student loves nature, have them water the plants on a regular schedule. Responsibilities are a great way to have each student caring and thinking beyond themselves.

Teach how our words matter. Have each student draw a heart on paper and cut it out. Talk about different things we can say to each other that can be kind or hurtful. For each statement, have students make a fold in their heart. At the end of the activity, open the heart back up and discuss that the marks are still there long after the words have been said. Remind students that our words leave a lasting impact so it’s important to stop and think about what we say to each other.

Build confidence. Sometimes kids and young adults who lack empathy appear to be over-confident because they don’t seem to care how others feel in the moment. However, this can actually be superficial. These learners may actually struggle with feelings of rejection from their peers, leading to lower self-confidence. Make sure to spend time on building every child up and helping them share their strengths, passions, and dreams. When kids feel better, they usually do better, too. Use these confidence-building activities to get started.

Collaborate with school specialists. If you have a student who is struggling with showing empathy, talk with the school counselor or social worker for additional input and ideas. It might even be beneficial to have them come into your class for a quick lesson or activity.

Practice mindfulness. Kids and young adults can greatly benefit from learning to be in touch with their own emotions first and foremost. Spend 5 or 10 minutes practicing mindfulness after lunch, before a big test, or just to start the morning out in a more positive way. Read up on ways you can practice mindfulness and some free resources to help you practice mindfulness with students.

Encourage random acts of kindness. Kindness is about being thoughtful without expecting anything in return. Teaching and encouraging kind acts can help learners start to think about the feelings of others. You can start a random acts of kindness jar or bulletin board in the classroom. When a student witnesses a kind act, have them write it on a slip and post it. At the end of the month, you can choose to pick one randomly to win a special reward.

Engage in community service. Empathy and compassion go hand-in-hand. Encourage learners to think about the community and world by doing community service acts. Spend time cleaning up the courtyard, visit another class to read books to younger students, or even come up with a plan to donate supplies to a local animal rescue organization.

Start a kindness share. Give each student a piece of paper (have them cut it into a heart if you want!). Have students write their names on the paper and pass it to their right. When they get a piece of paper, they should write something kind about that person right on the paper. Continue the share until all students have written something kind about someone else. At the end, every child will have given back AND gotten kind words in return.

Teach students to respectfully disagree. Part of building empathy means recognizing that others can think differently from you. Help students learn the skills to accept and respect the opinions of others when they disagree. Encourage students to use phrases like, “I see your point,” and “I have a different point of view, but I see where you are coming from.”

Teach social-emotional learning explicitly. Give social and emotional learning the time it needs by dedicating time each day or week to these skills. One of my favorite strategies for this is using a daily ssocial-emotional learning journal to teach and discuss the skills every day of the year. I have also developed a complete social emotional learning curriculum for elementary learners to help students learn the skills they need in an explicit way. I also have a complete social-emotional learning curriculum for older kids.

Do you have other strategies for building empathy? I’d love to hear them! Share your thoughts in the comments!

5 FREE Mindfulness Activities

June 17, 2019 by pathway2success Leave a Comment

Mindfulness has been a growing trend with kids and young adults, and I have been a huge supporter from the beginning. About ten years ago, I started practicing yoga, which introduced me to the benefits of deep breathing, meditation, and mindfulness in my own life. Without a doubt, it has made a huge difference for me, so I love the idea of sharing some of those same strategies and practices with kids and young adults. Today, I have heard that many schools are getting on board with meditation rooms instead of detention and daily mindfulness practice during morning meetings. This just makes sense, so I wanted to share more about what mindfulness is and how you can practice it with your learners.

What is Mindfulness? Mindfulness is a practice that helps us to focus on the present, rather than the past or the present. Learning to be more present in the moment is a critical skill, especially in today’s fast-paced world. When we work on this practice, we can actually improve our focus, strengthen our emotional control, increase positive feelings, and bring calm to our everyday lives. It’s important to note that learning to be mindful doesn’t happen after one activity or lesson. The idea is that it is a “practice” because it is something we are always improving.

When Can We Practice Mindfulness? Mindfulness can really be practice anytime! Some of the best times to practice mindfulness include right before a big test, after a noisy lunch, before or after a transition from one activity to another, or just in the morning as a positive start to the day. The biggest benefits to mindfulness are seen when it becomes a regular practice. So, try to incorporate it either once a day or once a week – whatever works best for you and your learners! Feel free to read up more on 10 Best Times to Practice Mindfulness in the Classroom.

Remember, that you don’t need to be a mindfulness expert to start the practice with your students. Let them know you are learning and growing, too! If you notice that mindfulness is something you’re interested in practicing with your learners, but still need extra support, I’ve got you covered. You can use my set of Mindfulness Activities filled with lessons, task cards, breathe boards, and crafts centered around helping kids become more mindful.

Here are five FREE mindfulness activities to help get you started today:

#1 Mindfulness Breathe Boards. One of the most important components to mindfulness is learning to control our breathing. Sometimes this can be abstract for students, so these mindfulness breathe boards serve as concrete visuals to help. Just have students trace their finger around the visual while breathing in and out. This should be done multiple times. Best of all, these breathe boards can be placed on a student’s desk, in a binder, in a calm down area, or anywhere else a student might need them.

#2 Mindful Coloring. Drawing and coloring are often calming activities to begin with, of course. You can use these free coloring pages or just find any coloring books of your own. I often let my students choose from a huge pile of coloring books so they had more buy-in when practicing together. Start by explaining your students will be practicing mindfulness while coloring. It’s important to highlight that if students feel like they made a mistake, they should just breathe in and out and let it go. Mindfulness is about being present in the moment, making judgments about what is good or bad. Let students choose their coloring page and give them access to the coloring materials you choose. Encourage the students to color quietly on their own. You can dim the lights and play calming music while they color.

#3 Practice Guided Meditations. Guided meditations are a short script or video clip you can play that helps students relax their minds and bodies. There are many free guided meditation videos for kids on YouTube and other video platforms. Have students sit comfortably or lie down on a rug. Have them close their eyes and practice their deep breathing. Turn the lights off for an added calming effect! As they get comfortable, start the guided meditation and let it play through. Kids might feel silly at first, but with just a few minutes, they will notice the calming effect this meditation can bring!

#4 Positive Affirmations. There is not much else better than positive affirmations! Teaching kids to read positive affirmations aloud to themselves or just in their heads can bring a sense of calm while also increasing confidence. It’s a win-win! Use this free list of positive affirmations. Have students circle or highlight the positive affirmations they love the most. Have students read these to themselves or make index cards with their favorite sayings.

#5 Mindfulness 5-4-3-2-1. This is one of my favorite strategies for practicing mindfulness because it can be done anywhere and anytime. You don’t need any special props! Have students sit comfortably and just look around the room. Tell them to use their senses to observe the immediate environment. Slowly go through the list. Have them identify 5 things that they can see, 4 things they can touch, 3 things they can hear, 2 things they can small, and 1 thing they can taste. Take your time with each and remind students to absorb the feelings they experience.

Give one or two strategies a try! It might take some time, but it’s wonderful to see students really getting into their own mindfulness practices. Of course, mindfulness is always helpful for adults, too!

50+ FREE Rewards & Incentives for Kids

June 2, 2019 by pathway2success Leave a Comment

Rewards and incentives can be a critical component to classroom management success. They are also the perfect tool to help learners to go outside their comfort zones and learn new skills. Simply put, providing rewards and incentives encourage positive behaviors. Sometimes rewards are seen in a negative light when they are compared to bribes. This just isn’t the case! In real life, we all work for incentives and reward ourselves from time to time. After working on report card comments for a few hours, you might reward yourself with some downtime reading or watching television. You might also save a little extra money each month in order to go on a special vacation or trip, your incentive. These are adult real-life examples just to illustrate that rewards and incentives can be positive and encouraging. It is important to be mindful about how and when rewards and incentives are given, but they are a powerful tool!

When should I provide incentives? Incentives and rewards are extremely versatile. You might give a random whole-class reward when you are out sick and get a stellar report from the sub that day. This will highlight and reward the positive behaviors of the class as a whole, encouraging the same behaviors for the next time. You might also set up individual rewards with a student who is struggling with a specific behavior, such as completing homework or raising their hand in class. You could make a contract with that student and set up some rewards they will earn when they achieve their daily or weekly goal.

Why do I need a reward list? It’s important to always keep things fresh, fun, and interesting for kids. Sometimes the same old rewards and incentives can get stale or boring for students. That doesn’t mean you won’t be able to use them again in the future – you definitely can! It just means it’s often helpful to change things up. To help, I put together a list of over 50 reward ideas for kids. You can grab this free printable reward list and keep it in your teacher binder for reference when you need new ideas!

Reward Ideas for Kids:

Drawing time
Choose your seat
Teacher helper
Craft time
Reading time
Extra music time
Extra recess or gym time
Extra art time
Line leader
Half homework pass
No homework pass
10-minute break pass
10-minute talk with a friend pass
Choose your partner or group
First to share
Lunch with teacher
Lunch with a friend
Bonus points on test/quiz
Extra computer time
Sit in special seat
Borrow principal’s chair for the day
Choose the music
Positive phone call together
Visit another teacher
Positive principal visit
Listen to music while working
Positive note home
Show and tell with class
Choose the read aloud
Swap seats for a day
Tell jokes to the class
Choose from prize bin
Special snack
Pretend it’s your birthday
Work in the hallway
Write with special pen all day
Read the morning announcements
Get a mystery gift
Have teacher attend after school event
Pick out new game for class
Pick out new classroom materials
Choose a classroom job
Assign classroom jobs
Wear a hat for the day
Borrow a game for the weekend
Help design and put up bulletin board
Earn a certificate
Library pass
Help in the office
Help the custodians
Help in the library
Work anywhere in room
Help teach a lesson
Feed class pet
Read to younger students
Lesson of their choice
Read to the class
“Student of the Day”
Allow student to create a club
Invite parent for the day
Help make the quiz/test
Book fair certificate
Free answer coupon
Take a walk pass
Royalty for the day
Best seats at assembly

If you love this list, make sure to grab your free copy with reward ideas for elementary kids, older kids, and even whole-class rewards. What rewards would you add to the list?

25+ Strategies for Kids with ADHD

May 19, 2019 by pathway2success Leave a Comment

25+ strategies for kids and teens with ADHD! Help students find success in the classroom with organization, study strategies, extra movement, building confidence, strategies for attention, setting up a work station, and more. Activities and materials to use to help children and young adults be more independent. #adhd #pathway2success

Kids and young adults with ADHD can be extremely bright, creative, and helpful. These are often the learners coming up with new invention ideas, filling up a journal with intricate comic book drawings, and eager to answer all of your questions in class. With that said, learners with ADHD can struggle in the classroom setting. They might be prone to forgetting assignments, struggling to focus during lessons, misunderstanding directions, shouting out during discussions, and having difficulty with social situations.

Given all the strengths and challenges for kids with ADHD, these kids need their time to shine! Setting up some accommodations and supports can go a long way to helping learners with ADHD succeed.

Here are over 25 strategies educators can try to help learners with ADHD:

Give extra opportunities for movement. A few years ago, I signed one of my students up for an extra gym class. Other years, we spent our homeroom time in the gym running and playing basketball. Other options include having your student help pass out papers or giving them items to deliver to other classrooms (sometimes this can be real items you need to get places, or just a task to get the student up and moving). It can also be extremely helpful to incorporate movement into your actual lessons. Even just moving from center to center can give a student the break they need to do their best.

Consider flexible seating. Wobble stools are definitely one of my favorites! They give kids and young adults a chance to wiggle and move while still staying seated. Other options include yoga balls, floor seats, scoop rockers, or even standing while working.

Set up a work station in each class. Kids with ADHD can often struggle with organization and remembering to bring materials. While the goal is always to have those learners become more independent and learn strategies to become more organized, it’s important they are not missing out on their education in the process. Set up a work station in each classroom with required books, paper, pencils, and other necessary resources that student may need. The idea is that those materials stay in the classroom and never leave, so that the student always has materials to get started on their work for the day.

Give clear verbal and written instructions. Kids with ADHD can struggle with following multi-step directions given all at once. Being concise and clear with your words can help kids understand exactly what they need to do. Further, providing directions in written AND verbal form can make sure students won’t forget that information. It can be helpful to keep directions in one place on the board at all times. This routine can help kids know exactly where they should be looking if they are lost.

Teach executive functioning skills. Learning how our brains work can be such a powerful tool, especially for kids who already struggle with organization, planning, attention, managing emotions, and more critical executive functioning skills. Be explicit in teaching executive functioning skills to help empower kids and young adults and give them the skills they need for success.

Use checklists. I love checklists because they can be used for anything and they teach a critical life skill. If your student is forgetful about bringing materials home at night, put an end of the day checklist in their locker. If your student struggles with transitioning from one activity to another, add a transition checklist on top of their desk. It’s important to note that students need to be taught how to use checklists and given lots of time to practice. Of course, the goal is that they will be able to use the checklist completely on their own!

Use a visual schedule. Kids with ADHD can have difficulty planning and understanding time. Using a visual schedule of what students will be doing can ease their minds and help them recognize what’s coming up next. It can also reduce off-task questions during a lesson about when lunch or gym time is!

Explicitly teach how to organize. Getting and staying organized is not intuitive to many kids with ADHD. Take the time to teach strategies and plans for getting organized, including how to organize your binder, what your desk should look like, how to organize homework assignments, and developing an organized work space at home.

Incorporate routines. As much as possible, add routines into your classroom. While extra time is needed to teach and practice routines, this will pay off tremendously in the end. Routines help kids with ADHD know exactly what they need to do at what times. It takes the guess work out of situations like morning work, transitions, and reading time.

Schedule an organizing check-in time. Once a week, schedule a chunk of time dedicated for organizing materials. Friday can be a good day to do this so that the student is tidying up everything from the week and getting ready for the next. During this time, have the student use a checklist to go through their binders and materials, putting papers where they need to go. Truly ALL students can benefit from a weekly organization time, but it could be critical for kids with ADHD.

Use a thought journal. For students who struggle with talking out a lot, help them share their thoughts in a positive and more private way with a thought journal. They can write to you in their thought journal and have a spot for questions they want to look up later.

Incorporate brain breaks. A brain break is a short activity that helps “reset” the brain between academic tasks. Students with ADHD are often using up lots of brain power to pay attention, stay organized, manage their time, and use self-control in academic settings. Giving a quick brain break can help students feel refreshed and ready to start a new task.

Consider a digital homework log. If the student has a tablet or other electronic device, sometimes it helps to store homework there instead of on paper or a notebook that can get lost.

Teach about ADHD. Learners should know and own their individual strengths and weaknesses. Learning about their own ADHD can help kids understand the challenges in front of them and be more willing to use supports and strategies to help. It’s important to not teach ADHD as an excuse for poor choices. Instead, focus more on self-awareness and the idea that we can improve when we know what challenges we are dealing with.

Give time for organization throughout the day. When switching from one task to another, kids are going to need a little bit extra time to put materials away in the right spot and take out what else they need. Moving along too fast, without stopping to get organized, can cause kids to just shove papers away mindlessly in their desks or books. This, of course, reinforces negative behaviors for disorganization. One simple solution is just taking a few extra minutes between transitions to help your student get situated and ready to go for the next task.

Use a timer. Help kids learn to recognize and understand the importance of time management and pacing with a timer. You can say, “We have 20 minutes to work on our writing prompts. During that time, we’ll need to take out our writing journals, plan out ideas on paper, and write at least 2 paragraphs. I’m going to set the timer for 20 minutes.” Visual timers are actually the best because they show how much time is left before they go off!

Focus on confidence-building. Many students with ADHD struggle with low self-esteem. Sometimes, this is hidden by silly attention-seeking behaviors, but don’t let that fool you. A number of students with ADHD struggle in school socially, emotionally, and academically. You can teach skills for success and build confidence at the same time! Give the student a special job in class that only they are responsible for. Let the student teach the class about something they are an expert in. Have the student keep a list of all of their positive qualities and refer back to it when they need. These are just a few small examples that can build up over time.

Give time warnings. Help students improve their time management skills by giving warnings when 10 or 5 minutes of a lesson are left. You can even get in the habit of ringing a bell when there are 5 minutes left of a working period. This gives students a chance to plan, organize, and be ready to transition to what’s next.

Practice social skills. It’s no secret that kids with ADHD often struggle socially. If your student doesn’t have a strong foundation of social skills, teach them! You can put together a small social skills group that targets skills they need. If your time is really limited and this isn’t an option for you, talk to your school social worker or school counselor and see if it’s an option for them. I have social skills resources for younger kids and lessons for older kids, too. Sometimes, kids have the foundation of social skills and still don’t apply them, though. In this case, it’s important to remember that the skills need constant practice, discussion, and reinforcement. Add some social skills task cards to your morning meeting time or between transitions to discuss social situations and how students should behave.

Incorporate behavior plans. Some students truly benefit from a structured behavior incentive plan. This is especially helpful for kids who just can’t see far into the future. Students need to know after they finish these 3 (or any number) tasks, they will earn their free time. When you develop your behavior plans, it’s extremely important to do it WITH your student. They are, of course, the whole reason for the plan! Not only does it help create buy-in, but your learner can give valuable information about what they’d like to earn most and what they think they can do to earn that reward. Keep in mind that behavior plans are not a “set it and forget it” intervention. Students with ADHD can often get “bored” of the reward and you might need to change things up frequently to help the student achieve success.

Reduce distractions. This one might seem obvious, but is sometimes overlooked. Be mindful about where you seat a student with ADHD. Right by the door, the pencil sharpener, the fan, or a window probably isn’t the best idea. While these seats might be moderately distracting for a student without ADHD, it can be unbearably difficult for kids with ADHD. Consider the layout of your classroom and develop a working space that works for your student. Other distractors might include artwork hanging from the ceiling or colorful bulletin boards. This isn’t to say you can’t have these things in your classroom, but it’s important to be mindful about them when you have a student with ADHD.

Give positive feedback. As much as possible, focus on positive and specific feedback for your student. Kids with ADHD are prone to hearing lots of negatives sometimes. This can be extremely challenging for them and even cause learned helplessness. When the student is starting their work, let them know by saying, “Nice job getting started on your writing right away, and look how much you got done because of it!”

Chunk long-term projects. Whether a project is due in 3 days or 2 weeks, kids with ADHD are likely to struggle with any type of long-term assignment without support and scaffolding. So often, these students have wonderful and robust ideas, but lack the ability to plan, organize, and manage their time well enough to see those ideas through. Create mini-deadlines along the way for each project to provide structure. Conference with the student and give them a schedule or timeline of the mini-deadlines. Each deadline should specify what needs to be completed by which date. Then, at each deadline, it’s important to truly check in with the student and hold them accountable for what is due. Give feedback and make a plan going forward to the next deadline. At first, it’s likely an adult will have to spell out many of these tasks for their students. With time and practice, you should work towards discussing, collaborating, and creating mini-deadlines together in a conference so that students will eventually be able to chunk long-term projects on their own.

Incorporate hands-on learning. Simply put, kids with ADHD learn best when they are doing! Try to add opportunities for kids to experience learning in a hands-on and interactive way. For example, after reading a novel, have students work together to act out a scene. If you are studying cells in science class, let your students create a model out of materials to present. Being creative with hands-on learning experience can make a huge difference for some learners with ADHD.

Offer choices. Giving students simple choices can be a win-win for both the student and teacher. You can offer choices on which work is to be completed and how work is completed. When studying different states in the United States, let your learner select which state to research on his or her own. If you are focusing on paragraph writing, ask if they want to write in pencil, pen, or with a gel pen. As silly as it sounds, small choices go a long way. They can make dull tasks fun, exciting, and personalized. Sometimes, this is just what a kid with ADHD needs to get and stay motivated!

Partner with families. Reach out to families early and always start with the positive! This sets the tone in a way paved for success. It’s important to also meet with the family early on to discuss strengths, challenges, and goals. Sometimes, it can be helpful to have a weekly progress check through phone or email just to let the parents know how your student is working towards those goals. Other times, a daily behavior log that needs to be signed by parents is best. Keep in mind that if your student needs incentives, home-based ones can often be very powerful. Discuss how you can work together to get the child what he or she wants while also progressing towards success in the classroom.

Schedule toughest academics early. If you can, schedule your student’s toughest academics in the morning. Students are more likely to be focused and on-task earlier in the day than in the afternoon. Sometimes, I know this just can’t be done, but if you can, it could make a big difference.

Use peer role models. Consider seating your learner next to a peer role model in the class who can model on-task behaviors and positive decision-making skills. It is important and healthy to switch students every so often so that one student doesn’t end up relying on another.

Teach positive self-talk. Kids and young adults with ADHD unfortunately hear a lot of negative feedback. It’s important to keep them confident and strong while working on their challenges. One simple way to do that is to teach them how to use positive self-talk, a strategy they can keep with them wherever they go.

Provide fidgets. Before using any fidgets, it’s most important to actually teach how to use them. Students should understand that they are tools and not just something to play with. It’s simple: If they are helping the student focus, they’re working! If they are more of a distraction, they should be put away. Stress balls, Velcro strips, and putty are a few easy-to-find fidgets you can try out in the classroom.

What other supports and strategies do you use for your learners with ADHD? I’d love to hear!

12 Basic Social Skills Kids Need

May 1, 2019 by pathway2success 1 Comment

Social skills are a critical element to helping kids succeed socially, emotionally, personally, and even academically. These are the skills are the behaviors that help kids join in conversations, collaborate with peers, develop lasting friendships, self-advocate when they need help, and so much more. It would be ideal if all learners walked into classrooms equipped with strong social skills ready for success. The truth is, though, that kids are kids; they are still developing, learning, growing, and trying to make sense of the social world around them. As adults, the biggest impact we can have to help kids learn social skills is to teach them.

Quite often, I get asked, “But doesn’t everyone need social skills? Why do you target kids specifically?” To me, the answer is obvious. If we teach kids and young adults these social skills from an early age, they will have the foundations they need as adults. So, when kids need social skills, let’s teach them!

To help highlight how important these social skill are, I created a complete set of Social Skills Visuals. You can use them as a bulletin board, post them as reminders all around, or use the pages to highlight a few skills each week. And if you’re looking for even more ways to teach social skills, feel free to check out my social skills activities for elementary and social skills lessons for older kids.

Here are 12 basic social skills and strategies for teaching them:

Following Directions. This is having the ability to listen, understand expectations, and follow through in a timely manner. Learners need to learn how to follow directions to help them complete tasks, whether it is an assignment in class or instructions from a future boss.

Strategies to teach:

Play games for following directions, like Simon Says and Freeze.
Practice giving both verbal and visual directions.
Teach and practice how to read directions BEFORE starting an assignment.
Have learners highlight or underline directions on assignments before starting.
Have learners make a checklist for following directions for any task (like making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich) to help them see why directions should be clear and followed well.

Using Manners. Our manners are the courteous behaviors to we to show we are kind and respectful. All kids need to understand manners so they can be socially appropriate in a variety of settings, such as a restaurant, at the library, or even answering the phone.

Strategies to teach:

Post visuals of “manner words,” such as please, thank you, and you’re welcome as reminders.
Make it a habit to model and say these words with students and colleagues.
Explicitly teach about manners and discuss what manners we use in different settings.

Having a Positive Attitude. A positive attitude is the first step to having a growth mindset. By having a positive attitude, kids can learn to be more optimistic and see the bright side of things.

Strategies to teach:

Model having a positive attitude, even when things don’t go as planned (ex: “I was really looking forward to outdoor recess today, but now I am excited to play some chess instead!”).
Practice and discuss positive self-talk.
Read picture books about a positive attitude: Ish by Peter H. Reynolds and Because Amelia Smiled by David Ezra Stein.

Working with Others. All learners need skills to positively work with others by listening, collaborating, helping, and doing their fair share.

Strategies to teach:

Explicitly teach skills for working well with others.
Make a list of “group ground rules” for how to work successfully with others (listening to each other, staying with the group, staying positive, etc.).
Give lots of practice in partners and small groups.
Make sure students are frequently working with different people.
Sometimes give learners the chance to pick their partners, while assigning students at other times.
Keep a list of sentence starters kids can use in groups to collaborate such as, “I really like how you…” and “Can we try…”

Good Hygiene. Proper self-care means keeping yourself well-groomed and neat. This is an important skill because not only is it about being clean, but it helps everyone make a positive first impression.

Strategies to teach:

Talk about what good hygiene means, such as washing hands and showering/bathing daily.
Give reminders for hygiene, depending on age level.
Talk to the school counselor or social worker about coming in for a lesson on hygiene.

Using Polite Words. Using kind and polite words is just another way to spread kindness to others. Sometimes, I call this “using kind words only.”

Strategies to teach:

Teach about kindness and why it matters.
Discuss polite and kind words.
Teach about using a social filter, including thinking about how our words impact others.

Taking Turns. Learning to turn-take involves alternating between two or more people. This is an important skill to show courtesy and respect during conversations and other activities.

Strategies to teach:

Explain what it means to take turns and discuss scenarios, such as in sports, conversations, games, and more.
Practice turn-taking with board games.
Practice turn-taking with conversations (whole class and small groups).
Have students hold a special tangible (a ball or stuffed animal) when it is their turn to talk.

Greetings. Welcoming others and making them feel valued is an important social skill. By teaching kids and young adults how to properly greet others, it can help create a positive community for all. This is also an important lifelong social skill for the workplace and beyond..

Strategies to teach:

Model greetings each morning with each student as they walk in.
Teach different greeting and allow students to choose how to greet each other.
Start the day with a morning meeting and a greeting.

Waiting and Having Patience. Developing patience is a critical skill during times when we have to wait. Kid and young adults might have to wait in line at the pencil sharpener or wait for their turn to speak in a group, just to name a few. By having patience, they show that they are courteous and respectful to all.

Strategies to teach:

Teach strategies for what to do when waiting (doing something else, using positive self-talk, etc.).
Discuss scenarios when kids have to wait and discuss how they can handle it.
Read picture books about patience: Waiting by Kevin Henkes and Are We There Yet? by Dan Santat.
Use social scripts to help teach skills for how to wait in social situations.

Being a Good Sport. Learning to be a good sport can help kids and young adults be respectful when they engage in games and activities. It can also help them positively cope with losing by focusing on having fun instead of winning.

Strategies to teach:

Teach and discuss expectations for being a good sport.
Focus on having fun, playing, and learning rather than winning.
Give reminders about being a good sport before activities.
Use social scripts to remind about being a good sport before activities.
Practice being a good sport during games (anything from board games to outdoor sports during recess).
Practice and discuss having a growth mindset to help when students lose.

Listening to Others. Skills for listening are critical to building positive relationships with others. Kids and young adults should learn how to focus their attention to others, put away distractions, and really think about what someone else is saying.

Strategies to teach:

Start the day with a morning meeting and give time to share thoughts.
Teach the basics for listening: making eye contact, putting distractions away, thinking about what someone is saying.
Give discussion time in your content area subjects.
Practice listening with discussion times.
Teach students how to summarize what they heard: “So what I heard you say is that…”.

Understanding Personal Space. Having a good understanding of personal space helps everyone feel more comfortable in social situations. It also gives way to teaching that consent is needed to be in someone else’s personal space.

Strategies to teach:

Teach students that they have an invisible bubble around them called their personal space. Explain why having personal space is important.
Teach and discuss expected behaviors with personal space such as standing an arm’s length away while talking and keeping hands to self.
Act out what personal space looks like in different scenarios.
Teach students how to ask permission if they would like to give a friend a hug.
Read picture books about personal space: Personal Space Camp by Julia Cook.

If you have more suggestions or ideas for teaching these skills, feel free to share! I would love to add to the list. Be sure to also check out all of my social skills resources to get started teaching these important skills right away!

Interventions for Executive Functioning Challenges: Attention

April 15, 2019 by pathway2success 1 Comment

Challenges with focus and attention can become a huge roadblock to learning for kids and young adults. Simply put, attention is critical to learning. If students can’t focus on the lesson, they are going to struggle with understanding the new content. If students can’t focus on the directions, they are not going to know what to do. If learners are unable to switch their focus, they are unable to initiate new tasks. When students have difficulty with attention skills, it can be challenging for the educator, but also extremely frustrating for the learner.

It’s important to note that this article isn’t specifically written for kids with ADHD. That is because many kids (whether diagnosed with ADHD or not) have challenges with focus and attention. As always, it’s more important to focus on the interventions and supports than the label. With that said, if you feel your student or child does have symptoms of ADHD, it’s important to share those concerns with the school team or pediatrician.

What is attention? Attention is a fascinating multi-faceted skill. It is so much more than just being able to stay focused. Attention involves having self-awareness about your level of attention so that you can direct and re-direct your focus, as needed. It is being able to ignore distractions, like a cell phone or friends talking nearby. Even further, attention is being able switch your focus to more important information or a new task, such as when new directions are being given while working.

• Examples of Attention •

It’s important to note that attention is an academic skill, but it is also a life skill. It’s really a prerequisite to be able to learn new information. People need to pay attention while hearing new content, but also when having conversations with others. Here are some examples of what strong attention skills might look like:

Keeping eyes on the teacher and listening while learning about a new skill.
Quickly being able to switch focus from one task to another.
Making eye contact and listening to a peer during a conversation.
Listening and thinking about directions being given by a teacher or boss.
Being able to stop, focus, and listen when important information is being conveyed.

• Possible Signs of Challenges with Attention •

Challenges with attention can have big impacts for students. As previously stated, when learners aren’t able to focus on new material, this makes learning that content that much harder. Similarly, when learners aren’t focused during instructions, they won’t understand how to proceed with an activity. Simply put, attention challenges become a major roadblock to learning.

Possible signs of attention challenges might include:

A student constantly staring out the window or down the hallway instead of watching the teacher during a lesson.
A learner who frequently misses hearing important instructions for tasks and then isn’t sure what to do.
A student who constantly plays with objects (pencils, toys, etc) instead of working on assigned tasks.
A child who is unable to finish assignments due to various distractions.

• Interventions, Supports, and Strategies for Attention •

Here are some strategies, activities, and ideas to help learners with time management challenges in the classroom:

Teach about attention and other EF skills explicitly
Give clear, one-step directions
Teach how to stay organized
Highlight most important directions on assignments
Teach and use classroom call-and response
Use a chime before giving important information
Incorporate movement during lessons and activities
Use visuals as reminders and supports
Reduce distractions around the room (ex: too many posters or a fan nearby)
Use preferential seating (find where the student can focus the best, as this is different for every child)
Incorporate hands-on learning activities
Use a study carrel (you can buy one or build it out of cardboard!)
Add center activities to allow for more movement during tasks
Break longer tasks into smaller, more manageable ones
Provide fidgets (and explicitly teach how to use them as a tool)
Give break breaks between lessons and activities
Teach students how to check in with themselves
Set a timer for work sessions
Consider a white noise machine or playing classical music during work sessions
Assign a study buddy during work sessions
Play attention-boosting games and play activities (like Simon Says)
Use student interests in lessons
Provide extra time to complete assignments

• Strategies for Parents to Support Attention Skills at Home •

It’s important to note that parents and families can also implement strategies to help at home! Here are some strategies parents and families can use at home strengthen skills for attention:

Be clear with directions (and give fewer words)
Allow wind-down time after school
Build in routines and consistency
Develop a “homework space and time” (and stick with it)
Teach self-monitoring
Break longer tasks into smaller, more manageable ones
Keep an organized and tidy work space to reduce distractions
Give check-ins during longer work sessions (“Show me what you accomplished so far.”)
Reduce distractions (television, cell phone, computer)
Model focusing while the child is working (read while they do homework, for example)
Use a white-noise machine
Give breaks after work completion
Incorporate rewards for completing chores or assignments

If you notice that your learners need some extra support with their attention and other executive functioning skills, I have units to target executive functioning skills for middle and high school learners and executive functioning skills for younger learners. Get all your materials in one spot to make teaching these skills a breeze!

This is a blog series focused on interventions to support executive functioning skills. Make sure you read up on interventions for planning and supports for organization!

15+ Benefits of Social Emotional Learning in the Classroom

January 15, 2019 by pathway2success 1 Comment

Social emotional learning isn’t just a fancy buzzword in education. It’s an approach that integrates critical life skills into the school curriculum to help learners reach their individual potentials. There are huge benefits to teaching social-emotional skills and incorporating them into what educators are already doing.

The research indicates that implementing a social-emotional approach in schools can make a real difference. A meta-analysis of research indicated that students involved in SEL programs made gains socially, emotionally, behaviorally, and academically (Durlak et al., 2011). While more research is needed, one thing is clear: Teaching social and emotional skills pays off.

If you want to teach social emotional learning in your classroom but aren’t sure how, I have created an entire yearlong SEL curriculum. It is composed of five core units, each with several lessons and activities to teach the skills kids and young adults need. There are a number of significant benefits to integrating SEL into the classroom. It’s very much worth the time and effort. Kids do best when they know how, so let’s teach them the skills to get there.

Here are just a few benefits to social emotional learning in the classroom:

Improves school and class climate. Kids and young adults need to feel safe, respected, and supported in order to do their best. Incorporating SEL into your classroom encourages all of those things and more, helping to create a more positive learning community for all.

Increases student motivation. Kids and young adults want to do better when kids feel good about themselves, their teachers, and school. Integrating skills for social emotional learning can help encourage learners to be themselves, feel more accepted, work towards goals, be willing to take risks, and just love learning. More motivation is always a good thing.

Teaches problem-solving skills. Learners need strong problem-solving skills in all areas of life. A huge benefit to social emotional learning is that much of it focuses on managing situations and problems in everyday life. If you get stuck on a math problem, what can you do? If you get in a fight with a friend, how might you handle it? If someone asks you to do something you don’t want to do, what could you say? All of these questions are discussions that might be taking place when SEL is integrated into the classroom.

Reduces behavior problems. So often, behavior problems are the result of skill deficits. In the words of Ross Greene, kids do well when they can. Once we teach skills for problem-solving, working with others, and managing emotions, we are likely to see student behavior improve.

Helps students set and meet goals. A big part of self-management is creating specific and measurable goals for the future. Goal setting is important in all areas of life, whether someone is making a goal to improve their math grade or identifying steps to get their dream job.

Gives a space to talk about mental health. Mental health is extremely important and often not talked about enough. Talking about social emotional learning gives kids and young adults the venue to talk about their feelings, thoughts, and needs. It should be healthy to talk about mental health.

Teaches study skills and habits. Time management, organization, and planning are important skills that need to be developed over time. It’s easy to assume that all learners have these skills automatically, but it’s often not the case. Best of all, these are skills that can be easily taught in harmony with academic curriculum, whether it is math, reading, music, science, or anything else.

Encourages empathy. Empathy is one of the most foundational social skills, and sometimes it is overlooked. Quite often, kids and young adults need to be explicitly taught how to think about the feelings and thoughts of others. Once they can do this, students are much more effective at maintaining relationships, resolving conflicts with peers, and showing kindness to others.

Teaches teamwork and collaboration. In order to be success now and in the future, kids need to learn how to work well with others. Social emotional learning skills help students learn how to work collaboratively with partners and small groups. That includes working with people who aren’t your friends, problem-solving through disagreements, being a good team player, and more. Of course, these are all skills that are critical to success in the classroom, too.

Improves academic performance. Sometimes educators think of SEL skills as completely separated from academics, but that’s actually not true. A number of social-emotional skills actually encourage and allow students to perform better academically. Just a few of those skills include goal setting, planning, staying organized, managing time, problem-solving, cooperating, working in groups, and much more.

Improves self-regulation skills. Being able to managing our own thoughts, feelings, words, and actions is paramount to social and personal success. SEL can help learners understand self-regulation so they can learn to manage their own behaviors in positive ways.

Teaches responsible decision-making. Without a doubt, decision-making is a critical life skill. Learners need to know how to understand choices, think about consequences, consider how choices impact them and others, and ultimately make a positive choice they are proud of. These skills don’t come easily, though! So often, learners have to make tough decisions without “easy” solutions or answers for them. This is why practice in this area is so important, and can truly pay off in the end.

Teaches disagreeing respectfully. Kids and young adults need to learn how to disagree respectfully as a critical social skill. This is an ability they will use in the classroom when working with peers, with friends outside the school walls, online, and more.

Increases personal self-awareness. It is important for learners to have a strong understanding of their own individual strengths and challenges. Self-awareness is having a clear and accurate view of oneself. When students understand themselves, they are better equipped to have a clear vision for the future and make better choices to reach those dreams.

Encourages perseverance and resilience. While these skills are similar, they are different enough to highlight and discuss. Perseverance is the ability to push through challenges, while resilience is being able to get back up after a failure or defeat. Both skills are critical for student success in and outside the classroom.

Improves confidence. All kids should feel good about themselves and who they are as individuals. In many ways, helping kids and young adults to feel more confident can help them become the best versions of themselves.

Improves relationship skills. We all want our learners to have better relationship skills. That includes understanding healthy vs. unhealthy relationships, developing skills to be a good friend, maintaining relationships, conflict resolution, repairing relationships, and more. Not only does it benefit the students in your classroom to get along with each other, but these are also life skills for the future.

Improves attendance. Some research has indicated that kids and young adults in SEL programs actually have improved attendance. This just makes sense; If kids feel more positive about school and have the skills to succeed, they are more likely to be prepared to come each day.

Teaches coping skills. All kids and young adults experience emotional distress from time to time. Managing emotions can be tough, especially if learners don’t have the tools to do it effectively. An important component in social emotional learning programs is teaching kids and young adults how to managing those feelings and cope with them in the best ways.

Creates a feeling of community. A positive school community is critical to help all learners succeed. By building relationships and talking about topics that really matter to kids, they are more likely to bond with each other and educators in the room. This creates a strong sense of community, acceptance, and support.

If you want more strategies for integrating social emotional learning in the classroom, check out this list of over 100 free SEL resources and ideas!

Interventions for Executive Functioning Challenges: Organization

December 16, 2018 by pathway2success 1 Comment

As kids get older, organization becomes ever more important! While it is a critical skill for all ages, kids and young adults are often just learning to develop and strengthen their skills as more responsibilities are added on in their lives. When you think about it, kids and young adults can have a lot to juggle between school, homework, friends, family, and activities. This often means that the level of organization skills can make the difference between things running smoothly and just chaos! Simply put, strong organizational skills set the stage for success for all learners.

What is organization? Organization is an efficient and orderly approach to tasks and keeping materials in order. Skills for organization are greatly related to the ability to plan, as one must have a plan for exactly how to organize! One of the key elements in learning organization is to have a place for everything ahead of time. This includes having binders or folders for each class in a notebook, having a hamper to put dirty clothes, and everything in between. Setting up systems for organization can lead to huge improvements, such as having a specific strategy for organizing binders or cleaning a room. It’s important to note, though, that organization takes real work even after systems have been set up! Learners must constantly re-organize and re-evaluate their systems for organization in order to stay neat and tidy in home, school, and beyond.

• Examples of Organization •

Organization is a critical skill, as it often flows over into all areas of an individual’s life. Just a few examples of what organization looks like includes:

Keeping a neat and orderly room.
Writing an essay with a clear beginning, middle, and end.
Bringing required materials, such as pencils, to class.
Having neat and tidy binders.
Developing an organized approach to completing a project.

• Possible Signs of Challenges with Organization •

Identifying challenges with executive functioning skills can make a huge difference for kids and young adults. We all have organization ups and downs, but if some of these behaviors occur on a more regular basis, it should be an indicator to consider extra interventions and supports.

Possible signs of challenges with organization include:

Forgetting to bring required materials, such as a pencil or correct binder, to class.
Misplacing or losing class assignments.
Putting class papers in a binder randomly without a sense of order.
Having a messy desk or set of binders.
Difficulty transitioning from one class to another.

• Interventions, Supports, and Strategies for Organization •

As a positive, organizational skills can certainly be improved and strengthened over time. Here are some activities, tasks, and ideas to help with organization needs in the classroom:

Teach organization and other EF skills explicitly.
Teach how to organize a binder and where materials go.
Schedule an organization boot camp time, focused just on organization skills.
Practice cleaning up and re-organizing as you work through a task.
Provide a visual reminder for what students need before they enter the classroom.
Set students up with a specialized homework folder or binder. Use this free homework binder to start.
Have students keep an assignment calendar or homework log to track daily and long-term work.
Consider apps for organization, like Trello or myHomework.
Write homework in the same exact spot every day.
Color code books and binders to match (i.e. blue for science and red for math).
Keep extra papers in a designated spot for students who are absent or lose them.
Keep a model notebook in a spot for students to review, as needed.
Clearly labels materials in the classroom.
Dedicate the last 3 minutes of every class to getting organized.
Keep a “classroom office” stocked with extra pens, pencils, and paper for students who forget them.
Use graphic organizers for writing assignments.
Use an end-of-the-day reminder sheet to help students think about what materials they need. Use this free reminder checklist to start.
Schedule a weekly 10-minute binder organization time.
Discuss how to organize different areas and where items should be put away. Start with this free organization activity.
Highlight positive examples of organization in the classroom.

• Strategies for Parents to Support Organization at Home •

Parents can play a huge role in supporting executive functioning skills at home. Since executive functioning skills impact all areas on a person’s life, it’s helpful for learners to practice these skills in different environments. Here are some activities parents and families can do to at home strengthen skills for organization:

Create daily and weekly chore charts with organization and cleaning tasks.
Reinforce cleaning up and putting materials away after completing a task.
Create checklists for cleaning and organizing materials.
Try to have a place for everything.
Avoid piles and put things away right away together.
Openly discuss plans and schedules for the week or weekend.
Use a calendar to keep track of home or school events.
Plan a weekly organization and cleanup time.
Play “Where Does This Go?”. Gather materials and have the child put them back in the right spot.
Create a designated spot just for homework with office materials, as needed.
Make organizing more fun by listening to music while you clean together.
Make it a game by gathering 10+ items and time the child returning them to their correct spots.
Use a morning or afternoon checklist to remind the child of their responsibilities before/after school.

Do your learners struggle with organization quite a bit? If so, you can get started by teaching executive functioning skills explicitly right away with some units I’ve developed. I have units to target executive functioning skills for middle and high school learners and executive functioning skills for younger learners. Spending a little extra time early on can make a world of a difference!

Also, this post is part of a blog series focused just on interventions for executive functioning skills! You can also read up on interventions to help with planning.

15+ Strategies to Help Build Self-Regulation Skills

November 5, 2018 by pathway2success Leave a Comment

Self-regulation is a critical skill for people of all ages. It is the ability that helps us to control our behaviors to make good decisions for the long-term, rather than just doing what we want in the moment. It’s also the skill that allows us to manage our emotions when we’re feeling angry, disappointed, or worried. These can be difficult for adults, but are significantly more challenging for children and young adults, whose brains are still growing and developing.

There are huge benefits to helping kids and young adults improve their skills for self-regulation. These skills can help kids and young adults to complete their work and chores (even if they don’t want to), maintain lasting friendships, make safe choices when out with friends, stop themselves from breaking a rule, work through challenges when they feel like giving up, and so much more. Simply put, kids and young adults are more likely to lead happier and healthier lives when self-regulation skills are strengthened. Of course, working on self-regulation skills doesn’t just happen overnight. Especially for those who struggle with them, these abilities must be working on and improved over time. The good news is that kids and young adults can learn strategies and skills to improve their self-regulation.

Here are 15+ strategies and ideas to use with your learners:

Practice self-control with games. There are many different games that help students work on their self-control skills! Jenga, Freeze, and Simon Says are just a few of them. One of my favorites is Blurt, but you could really play with any trivia questions or content from your curriculum. You can play with a small group of full class. Just have two students stand together at a desk. Ask them a question (from Blurt or your own), and only those two students can shout out the answer to the question. Everyone else must use self-control and remain silent, even if they know the answer. The person who says the correct answer will move on to the next desk, while the other student will sit down at that desk. As the game continues, the goal is to try and make it all the way around the room. Another one of my favorites is Guard Duty. This one is fun because students actually pretend they are guards at a palace and have be serious, even when someone might try to distract them. Of course, this is a perfect game when walking in the hallway on the way to another class. Try this set of Executive Functioning Games & Play Activities if you want more!

Create a share journal. If your student likes to share a lot of extra information throughout a class lesson, give them a special journal. They can write down all of their questions, thoughts, and connections in the journal. Once or twice a day, make sure to sit down with the student to review the journal and hear what they wanted to tell you.

Explicitly teach self-regulation skills. Some learners who struggle significantly with self-regulation skills can most likely benefit from a small group that targets these skills head on! Put together a group of your own during morning meeting, lunch time, or any other time that works to teach these skills. If you do not have flexibility in your schedule for such a group, consider talking with the school counselor, school psychologist, special education teacher, or social worker to create a group with the student or students you have in mind. More than likely, many other students can benefit from these skills, too! I have created a Self-Control Bootcamp for older students, as well as a Self-Regulation Station (with a train theme!) for younger learners. Use these group times to highlight what self-regulation and self-control are, why they matter, and specific strategies for how students can make improvements.

Use literature. Picture books are a great way to introduce and discuss self-regulation skills at all levels. Even my middle schoolers loved when I got the picture books out for a read-aloud! Some great options to target self-regulation skills include: My Mouth is a Volcano by Julia Cook, I’m in Charge of Me! by David Parker, and What Were You Thinking? by Brian Smith. One of my absolute favorites is Super George and the Invisible Shield by Laurie Mendoza. In this story, George has to learn some strategies to help him stay in control and out of trouble. With whatever books you choose, make sure to highlight the self-regulation skills, discuss how each character uses the skills, and how it relates to your students’ lives.

Use visuals as reminders. Visual supports can be extremely helpful reminders to students about routines and activities in the classroom. You can tailor your visuals for individual students. For example, if a student struggles with calling out during class lessons, add a visual on his or her desk that reminders about raising our hand first. If a student is having difficulty waiting in line, keep a visual showing reminders near the door.

Create a social scripts binder. Social scripts are short narratives about any situation. Create an individualized binder for your student with stories specific to their needs. For example, if a student struggles to self-regulate behaviors during transition times, add a story about transitions to their binder. If they continue having issues getting settled in the morning to start morning work, add a story about the morning routine. To start, have the student read through the social script prior to the activity to remind them what they should be doing before the task. Eventually, the goal is that the student will need the stories less and less, as they become more independent.

Give movement breaks. Kids and young adults who struggle with self-regulation often need extra physical activity built into their day. One simple strategy is to incorporate movement and break brains in between your instruction time. One year, I used our morning homeroom periods to play basketball in the gym. In another instance, I was able to schedule a student with an extra gym class throughout the week. It’s important to be creative because a little extra physical activity can often make a huge difference for these learners!

Practice mindfulness. So often, in our busy world, kids and young adults do not know how to “just be.” Mindfulness can be a perfect solution for that. While it’s not an instant fix, learning to be more mindful can help kids and young adult stay present in the moment, feel calmer, improve focus, and better manage emotions in the moment. There are many different strategies for practicing mindfulness. You can start with simple breathing exercising with these free mindfulness breathe boards. Another great activity is to practice mindful coloring, which involves just coloring and not talking to anyone else. I’ve developed a whole set of Mindfulness Activities to help learners improve these skills over time.

Develop routines for success. While many of these strategies are directed at the student, educators can also play a huge role in creating routines for success. Consider the specific areas where your student is struggling and identify routines and strategies you can implement. If a student seems to never remember to bring back their homework, set them up with a specialized homework binder to go home. If a student continually calls out during lessons, make a plan that you will call on them at least once during a lesson when their hand is up.

Discuss scenarios. Talk about real-life situations that encourage learners to stop and think about managing their behaviors. You might say, “Someone is kicking the back of your chair during a test and it’s really annoying you. What do you do?” Have students talk in small groups or partners and share about how they might handle those situations. While you can’t plan for every situation, using scenarios can help students train their brains for how to think through problems as they happen.

Use role-play. Using any of the topics you discuss as scenarios, act the situations out in small groups or partners. Not only is role-play a lot of fun for kids, but it makes it memorable. Note that it’s always most helpful to act out the socially appropriate way to handle situations. For this reason, it’s extremely helpful to partner students up with peer role models who can help kids brainstorm solutions for handling challenges.

Use guided meditation videos. A guided meditation is just a script that guides people through the practice of relaxing. Youtube is a great free resource for many guided meditation videos for kids and young adults. Another way to practice mindfulness and just being still, guided meditation helps kids learn to be in control of their bodies, thoughts, and emotions in the moment. Again, these would be a great activity to do before a test, after a transition, or just first thing in the morning.

Create a calm down space. Design an area in the room for students to go who need a few minutes to themselves. Not all students will need to use this area, but the ones who do, will benefit greatly. It’s important to teach that the calm down area is a space to self-regulate and get in control of emotions so we can return back to our normal days. Most of all, it’s critical to show all learners that it’s normal and healthy to need a break once in a while. Taking five minutes in the calm down area to gather your emotions is a much better choice than pushing someone or saying mean words you will probably later regret.

Develop SMART goals. A huge component to improving self-regulation skills is being able to get past the “right now”. Students need to be able to see the future and what’s in it for them. Take time with your learner to develop individualized SMART goals on areas that are important for them. Perhaps your student needs to improve the number of class assignments they complete, raising their hand when they have a comment to share, or using appropriate language in the classroom. Any of those could be written out as a smart goal, with specific strategies for the student to work on over time.

Teach how to gauge emotions. I love to use an emotions scale that helps students gauge the level of their emotions. So often, kids who struggle with self-regulation skills are missing this internal meter that lets us know how intense our emotions are at the moment. This helps students learn to be more self-aware about their emotions and body, and once students are more self-aware, they can be more open to finding solutions for their struggles.

Incorporate self-reflection times. All kids and young adults can benefit from becoming more self-reflective. That involves assessing past behaviors and choices, as well as identifying next steps for improvement. This can be a tough skill for kids to learn at first, especially because it can be so personal to admit where you went wrong. I suggest creating a reflection binder that holds information about student SMART goals and areas that the student needs to improve. Each reflection binder really should be individualized because every student needs to work on different things. Some students of mine had data on grades, while others focused more on behavior or attendance. Meet weekly with the student as an intervention. Discuss the goals, progress made, challenges, and next steps for the future. Most of all, try to let the student take the lead! This can slowly help him or her develop the ability to self-reflect and self-regulate in the future.

Encourage positive habits. Having a healthy diet and sleep pattern can contribute to how self-regulated someone is. Talk with the student and family about making sure he or she is well-rested at night to achieve success the next day. If this is an area you are not comfortable addressing yourself, consider consulting with the school social worker or school counselor for extra support.

What To Do When a Student Refuses to Work

October 15, 2018 by pathway2success 23 Comments

Throughout my years teaching middle school, I have had the experience of seeing many “work refusals”. These are the situations when kids, for a variety of reasons, just refuse to start the work you give them. They might shut down and rest their head on their desk or lash out in anger, shouting about how they just will not complete your assignment. This can be extremely frustrating for educators, especially when teaching a well-designed lesson that you thought would go so well! Let me say that sometimes our lessons themselves can have little or no impact on whether or not a student refuses to work. There are quite often bigger challenges at play that we’ll delve into. Quite honestly, even with a special education background, my college and training did not really prepare me for what to do when students refuse to work. These are skills and strategies I had to develop on the ground running while working with young adults. It’s an area I’m especially passionate about because all kids deserve to learn and feel good about themselves. It’s always important to remember that kids who are refusing are reaching out for help in some way, and you CAN be the one to help them.

Let me say that we ALL have bad days here and there! If a student puts their head down during a lesson and won’t finish an assignment because of a headache, it doesn’t mean you need to sound the alarm. This article specifically focuses on the students who repeatedly refuse to complete work and need specific targeted strategies to help them overcome these challenges.

What does work refusal look like? Really, it can be different for every student. Some students put their heads down and don’t pick them up, despite encouragement and prompting. Other students will look you straight in the eyes and say, “I’m NOT doing it!” while they are clearly expecting a response from you! Other kids might just ignore your directions completely and continue doing what they want to do, whether that is coloring, reading, or any other activity they are engaged in. All of these behaviors are work refusals because they are avoiding doing the tasks that the adult is expecting.

What are the reasons for work refusal? If a student is outwardly refusing to do work in the classroom, there is always a reason. Quite often, we don’t know the individual reasons. Some students have had a history of trauma. Again, we may or may not know about the potential trauma. Other students might be dealing with social or emotional challenges at home or in their personal life. Some examples might include a family divorce, a new baby at home, the death of a family member, and feelings of loneliness with a parent working increased hours. Those truly are just a few small examples. Sometimes, when the challenges in a child’s life become so difficult for them, they can have a need to control parts of their life that they can control (like doing work in school or not). Some learners might be diagnosed with oppositional defiant disorder, while others aren’t. Regardless of the actual reason, it’s important to take a step back and recognize that the child or young adult is struggling with SOMETHING, whether or not we can see it. Thinking in this way encourages educators to be solution-focused, which is what really matters anyway.

Here are some simple do’s and don’ts for kids who refuse to do work:

DON’T:

Don’t just punish. If a child or young adult is struggling with some social or emotional challenges at the moment, a punishment is only going to push them away further. Your punishment will appear as harsh, mean, and uncaring. I know that educators do not intend for punishments to feel that way, but for many students, they do, including those with trauma in their past. This isn’t to say you should “let the student get away” with any behavior. Instead, you can use logical consequences, which I explain below.
Don’t send the student out of the room. I can’t stress this enough! As an educator, I know this is sometimes a preferred option because it deals with the situation swiftly. It does not fix the problem, though. In fact, it will most likely make it worse in the long-term. The student might feel anger and resentment towards you. The message you are sending is that you can’t deal with the situation and you need to send the student out to another teacher or the principal. If a student is just sitting at their desk and refusing to work, it should not be a reason to send them out of class. Kids and young adults are getting much more education being in your room and hearing the discussions than being in the principal’s office.
Don’t get in a power struggle. No one ever wins in a power struggle! So much energy is wasted is wasted and even if the student eventually complies, it will be filled with resentment. Read up on more ways to avoid power struggles.

Don’t just assume the child is lazy. So many times, it is often actually easier for the child to comply and do their work and refuse. So, it’s clear that there is something else in play. Reframe your thinking to remember that the child is struggling and needs your support.
Don’t act out of frustration or anger. When you start to feel frustrated due to a child’s behavior, remember this phrase: “He’s not giving me a hard time, he’s having a hard time.” There is no shame in taking a deep breath and walking away from a situation. As adults, it’s important we are calm and collected so we can make the best choices in each situation. It’s okay to feel frustrated with a situation, just don’t act on that frustration.
Don’t use threats. You might be tempted to say things like, “If you don’t do your work, I’m going to call your parents,” or “Finish this or you can’t go to gym.” Sometimes, these threats can only make a student dig their heels in deeper and you might regret what you’ve said later on. Instead, be mindful about what you say and make sure your consequences fit the crime.
Don’t embarrass the student. Again, publicly calling the student out might result in a power struggle or escalating the situation. Instead, consider ways to privately support the student to help both of you get what you need.

Do:

Keep teaching. Just because a student doesn’t lift their pencil up, doesn’t mean they’re not listening and learning. Continue teaching, talking, and even involving that student if they want to participate. Remember that the ultimate goal is to educate the student, not force them to work. If they are in the classroom, keep teaching them!

Give wait time. When a student refuses work at first, sometimes all they need is a little wait time. It’s okay to let them have their head down or keep their arms crossed. Use planned ignoring and wait to see if they come around within 5 minutes or so.
Ignore the small behaviors. If the student crumples up the paper, breaks their pencil, or scribbles all over it, avoid the impulse to tell the student they shouldn’t do that or give any further instructions. When things like this happen, the student is either agitated or attention-seeking. One intervention that will help in this instance is just giving space.
Be reflective. Consider what you could be doing that might be triggering the student to refuse to work. For example, are you using a harsh tone? Did you embarrass the student by calling them out for something right before? Sometimes, there isn’t anything apparent, but it’s always worth considering first!
Focus on the relationship. For many kids, relationship is everything. Put the work aside for a bit. Spend time with your student during lunch, talk with them after class, and really just get to know them. Teach them about you as a person, too! Once a relationship is built, many times your students will have a much easier time working for you because they know you care. This isn’t a quick process, but it’s always important and worth it. Read up on more ways to build relationships with kids and young adults.

Consider learning challenges. Sometimes students refuse work due to social and emotional challenges, but other times it might be because they think the work is just too hard for them. Consider if the student needs interventions with reading, writing, or math. Sometimes learners might even need direction instruction with executive functioning skills to help them get started and work through challenges. If you are a regular educator, consider discussing the student with the special education teacher or interventionist to get some ideas and strategies.
Meet with the student privately. It’s important that this is seen as supportive and not punitive. Talk to the student, ask them what’s going on, and problem-solve about how you could help. You might say, “I noticed your morning work isn’t being finished, what is going on with that?” When meeting with a student who is struggling to complete work, the most important thing is to just listen! Try to avoid interjecting your own thoughts about what’s happening or giving your point of view. Let the student talk and sometimes you might be amazed at what you learn. Perhaps the student shares that they hate where they sit because someone keeps talking to them, or that they haven’t been getting any sleep at night due to a crying baby. Be open-minded, listen, and be prepared to problem-solve with the student to help them.

Use logical consequences (and consider them ahead of time). Logical consequences are outcomes from behavior that make sense. For example, if a student is refusing to finish their morning work, a logical consequence would be using some break time later in the day to finish at least 5 problems or sending it home as homework to be done later.
Discuss those consequences with the student. Consequences shouldn’t be a surprise to your student. Let them know ahead of time in a positive way. For example, you might say to the whole class, “Everyone needs to finish their work so we can finish watching the rest of the movie.”
Use de-escalation strategies to help calm the situation. In the moment, it can quickly become a power struggle when a student outwardly tells you they are not doing the work. It is critical to know how to de-escalate a situation. My favorite strategy has always been saying, “Let’s talk about this later.” It gives you the perfect way out of a heated situation with a student while letting other students around know you’re not ignoring the behavior, you’re just dealing with it later. Read up on more de-escalation strategies and use this free printable de-escalation strategy worksheet.

Give choices. For students who struggle with work completion, consider giving limited choices for assignments. Limiting the number to two is usually best so that it’s not overwhelming, but it still gives control and choice. You might say, “Would you rather write about this prompt in your journal or draw a scene from the text and write a sentence about it?”
Consider reducing work. Another one of my favorite ways to give choice is to allow the student to choose which 10 problems they will finish. Similarly, you might ask the student to complete only 1 of the 3 essay questions. Sometimes educators have argued that this is making it too easy on the student. Of course, the ultimate goal is to get the student back to completing all the work, without a doubt. However, when a student is outright refusing to do work, completing just one item over none is a success. We all have to start somewhere.
Provide accommodations. Giving accommodations doesn’t necessarily make an assignment easier, it just gives more options for how the student approaches the task. Allow a student struggling with reading to listen to audio books. If a student isn’t writing, allow them access to a laptop. Give out a calculator to a student who gets fatigued with math problems (provided the math skill isn’t calculations themselves). Give a word bank, provide multiple choices, let the student use manipulatives, and so on.
Think about trends. Is the work refusal only happening during math? Or maybe during partner work? Maybe it’s only in the morning or in the afternoon? Think about these trends and really delving into the data can help inform your judgements about what’s really going on.
Consider interventions for task initiation. Our skills for task initiation are like the motor that starts us up. When kids and young adults lack these skills to get started, it can be extremely frustrating for everyone involved. Sometimes, kids don’t actually know HOW to start a challenging task or assignment. It’s important to consider if these skills are lacking when a child or young adult isn’t completing work, because they can be taught. Read up more on this blog post focused on interventions for task initiation skills.
Create an incentive plan, if needed. Sometimes educators are opposed to incentives plans, and I agree they shouldn’t always be a first strategy. However, there is a time when they can a struggling student work towards their goals. You might develop a contract that outlines what the student is responsible for and what incentives the student will get by completing work. A contract sets the tone that you will stick to your word so you expect that the student makes an effort to do the same. Find out what the student would like to work for, remembering that each individual student is motivated by different things (I’ve had some students who want silent drawing time and others who want to help the custodian, for example). My favorite way to find this out is by using a reward inventory. You can visit here to see more about my reward inventories, behavior plans, and contracts.

Collaborate with families. It’s important to note that the first time you call the family shouldn’t be to mention that the student isn’t working. I’m a huge believer in always calling to share something positive first. With that said, it is important to share concerns about students who are struggling to work in class. Be mindful of how you communicate this with families, too. Rather than saying the child is “refusing to work,” share that they are “struggling with getting started even on assignments that are at their level.” Collaborate to discuss if anything is going on outside of home with the child and if there are any other strategies you as the educator can try. Often, parents are more than willing to talk with their child and sometimes (definitely not always) this even fixes the issue from the start.
Focus on your own self-care. This is definitely not stressed enough in the world of education. Working with students who are refusing to work can be emotionally draining. Take time to focus on yourself when you can. You can’t pour from an empty cup.

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